“Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be
called the children of God,” (Matthew 5:9). This is from the Sermon on the
Mount, particularly from the Beatitudes. Obviously, Jesus thinks that this is
important. If Jesus thinks this is important, I think that we should think it
important, as well.
That’s why mom has had us studying it in school.
One way to be a peacemaker is to not blow up at
other people. Don’t start arguments, and don’t give others reasons to start
them with you. Be nice to others and practice the golden rule, do unto others
as you would have them do to you.
Notice: not what they did to you. This is another
part of peacemaking, not swinging back when someone else starts the argument.
It is very hard to do sometimes, though.
A third way to be a peacemaker is to smooth out
pre-existing fights. Mediating between two non-talking parties is an excellent
way to do this. This is the hardest way, as it doesn’t personally involve yourself,
and you always have the greatest amount of control over yourself. Try to stay
out of other people’s conflicts, though
I’m not saying the first two are easy, it isn’t, but
at least it’s only you that you are trying to control. And you don’t sound like
a goody-goody in someone else’s fight. The second is probably the easiest, as
you aren’t personally, yet, the one blowing up, yet you are still part of it.
The hard part is that this usually involves taking the blame. Most people don’t
like this. I know I don’t.
Taking the blame is a good way to effect the first,
as well. Saying, “Your fault, your fault, your fault,” is just going to ruffle
the other’s feathers, and make them even more defensive and angry. Taking the
blame is hard, but is usually worth it.
But don’t be a doormat. Make yourself known, but do
it in a soft voice and not an accusing one. Be honest with yourself. Was it
your fault? If it was, say so, but if it honestly wasn’t, don’t lie. That just
complicates things. However, you can offer to take the punishment for it.
Don’t respond to teasing, and don’t tease. Teasing
is one of the best ways to start arguments.
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